The Outside World Is Your Friend

Hi my friend,

I hope this message finds you well and filled with peace.

Today, I wanted to share something that’s been on my heart.

Life is full of small, often unnoticed moments that ripple through the world, creating waves of change. I’ve always found beauty in these small, everyday actions—how they weave into the fabric of our lives, quietly affecting everyone around us. Simplicity is powerful. It is in the small, humble gestures that we find the loudest echoes.

One of my greatest joys has been observing these moments and passing them on. I remember seeing a lady tending her garden, nurturing each plant with care. Ever since then, every time I walk past a beautiful garden, I think of her. In that moment, her love for nature became a part of me. I once saw a man pick up litter without a second thought. The next time I’m outside, I did the same, imagining that somewhere, he was still doing it too. And when a woman, a stranger, smiled at me and wished someone a good day, I felt something light up inside. I wanted that warmth to spread, so now I say it to others, hoping my words will find their way back to her.

You see, these are the things that matter. These are the moments that remind us we are connected in ways we can’t always see. Each time I clean up a public space, I remember the joy of a woman I met in Malaysia who was overjoyed after cleaning a public restroom. Her happiness made something click in me—our small contributions to the world can carry immense weight. Now, I ask the waiters I meet, “How’s your day going?” because I remember the time someone asked me that in my early twenties. It was such a simple question, but it left a mark.

It’s strange how the most unassuming moments stay with us. I still remember a time when I was struggling with grief. I had lost my mother, and the wound felt fresh even years later. I locked eyes with an older woman one day, and in that brief moment, I saw such kindness in her gaze. It was like looking into my mother’s eyes again, and I thought, “This could’ve been my mom one day.” That moment healed something in me, something I didn’t even realize needed healing.

Over the years, I’ve watched people in their moments of joy, pain, and everything in between. I’ve seen their hearts—some heavy, some light—and I fell in love with every single one of them. I began to see my own suffering reflected in theirs. It dawned on me: we are all just trying to be happy. That’s all anyone really wants. But somewhere along the way, the idea of happiness got tangled up in expectations and illusions. For you, my dear reader, I want to offer this simple truth: happiness isn’t some grand achievement or distant goal. It’s found in peace, the quiet kind that settles within you. When you cultivate that peace, you begin to see the world differently. Those who shine the brightest, the kindest, most generous, most captivating, most inspiring souls I’ve met are the ones who have suffered the most—those who have seen the other side of the darkness.

The next time you’re on a plane, look down at the houses below. If it’s night-time, even better. Each house with its light on is a universe unto itself, each light representing a heart beating with its own story. In each home, people are living their lives—laughing, fighting, loving, grieving, learning. Everyone is trying to make sense of their own darkness and light. Have you ever noticed how we rush to turn the lights on when it gets dark? We aren’t afraid of the darkness itself; we’re afraid of what might be lurking within it—the unknown. But here’s the thing: we were born from darkness. It’s where we rest, where we dream, where we heal. We close our eyes to darkness every night to find peace.

I often think of the stars when I ponder this. We don’t judge the vast stretches of darkness between them, do we? Instead, we marvel at their light. The darkness is what makes them shine. And like the stars, we need both light and dark to fully be ourselves. We aren’t broken, my dear. We are fractured in ways that allow the light to seep through, in ways that teach us how to love deeper, to be more human. And isn’t that what life is? To live for love and to shine brighter because of it.

Here’s a poem I wrote that reflects this idea of balance between light and darkness:

As Above, So Below

What is above reflects below,
Like the sky mirrored in the ocean's glow.
One night, I flew towards Indonesia,
Gazing out from a window seat,
I saw the world, so small, yet so complete.
Each house, a spark of life,
A flicker in the vast, endless night.
Lights in windows, lives within,
Parents, children, joy, and sin.
Playing, arguing, eating, sleeping,
In every home, hearts are beating.
We are like stars, scattered bright,
Not seeking perfection, just shining our light.
When we gaze upon the sky so wide,
We marvel at stars, not what they hide.
We don’t scorn the darkness between,
We simply admire the beauty seen.
Yet we burden ourselves to be flawless and right,
Why can’t we, like stars, embrace the night?
For every soul fears the dark’s embrace,
Rushing to light, to fill the space.
But when it’s time to rest, to sleep,
We return to the dark, the silence deep.
Even as we close our eyes,
Darkness wraps us, no disguise.
Perhaps, like stars, we need to learn,
That light and dark, in cycles, turn.
In balance lies our true nature,
To be like stars, is to accept the fracture.

There will be days when you’ll think, “Humans are so frustrating, they are idiots,” and you’ll sigh in disbelief. But remember to follow that thought with, “Lovable idiots.” We are all just trying our best, stumbling along, doing what we can with what we know. If someone is unkind, let them be. People carry their past with them—sometimes it’s heavy, sometimes it spills over. They might see you and project their own experiences, fears, or biases onto you. Let them. Keep being yourself, and remember that you, too, have darkness within you. Meet it with compassion, and give the same to others. Eventually, you’ll notice a change—in them, and in you.

The outside world is not your enemy; it’s your friend.

I work in a café, and every day I meet grandpas and grandmas who carry wisdom in their stories. One day, I’ll be one of them, but for now, I watch and learn. They’ve let go of the things that don’t matter. They focus on the essentials: relationships, friendship, health, laughter, and nature. They remind me what true success looks like—living with an open heart.

In my journey, I’ve spoken to people from all walks of life—over 300 guidance sessions and counting. And the one thing that always leaves me speechless is the beauty of the human spirit. Every single person who comes to me saying, “I’m broken and lost,” has a light inside them that they often can’t see. But it’s there, and it’s beautiful. The world is changing, even if the media and news make it hard to see. They highlight the darkness, but don’t forget the light. Under the pressure, new stars are being born. Your small actions matter. Trust me, they do.

I was 24 when I had an out-of-body experience, a life review. I was shown my life from a higher perspective, and to my surprise, I was told, “Well done.” At that time, I had tied my worth to education, money, and success as the world defined it. I thought I was failing. But I was shown all the small, unseen ways I had made a difference, and I wept. I asked, “What more can I do?” The answer was simple: “You are already enough. Don’t do—just be.”

That was a revelation, and though it took time to accept, it changed how I saw myself. Now, when I’m invited to podcasts or interviews, I no longer question why. I understand that what makes me unique is my experience, my view, and my heart. That’s enough. I’m still a work in progress, and I always will be. But that’s okay. And I’m sharing this with you because I want you to know: it gets easier once you define what truly matters to you.

You are already enough.

You matter.

Your whole being is unique,

You are needed on Earth, You belong!

The outside world is your friend.

To be a star, to be light means to be fractured.

You are loved.

Arke

If you'd like to hear more about my journey and experiences, feel free to check out my latest video on YouTube: